連假第一天的台灣新聞,讓所有人都措手不及😢
但似乎也再一次提醒我,要更珍惜每一個「看似平凡」的小時光
珍惜此時生活中,陪在我左右的這個人
把握跟他們相處的每一分、每一秒,不留一絲遺憾。
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藉著這個機會,我也想要跟你分享五種「#愛之語」的概念
▸ ▸ 你知道,每一個人其實都有習慣「表達」與「接收」
#愛的特殊語言嗎?(就像中文、英文、法文等不同語言)
認識彼此喜歡的語言,用對方喜歡、能夠聽懂的語言
就能夠更有效地傳達你的心意讓對方知道
比較不會出現明明很愛他,對方卻一直說「沒有感受到」
這樣的失落和心酸呦~
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有時候只是習慣語言的差異,並不是事實🧡
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愛之語分成以下五種:
#1 Words of affirmation #肯定與誇讚
#2 Acts of service #實際的服務行為
#3 Receiving gifts #得到禮物
#4 Quality time #寶貴的相處時光
#5 Physical touch #肢體接觸
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你知道你自己喜歡哪些嗎?
你知道你的家人/另一半/朋友們喜歡哪些嗎?
還不知道的人,快一起來測試看看,也分享給身邊的人吧!🥰
讓我們把握機會,將對彼此的愛和重視傳遞給對方💪
words of affirmation中文 在 浩爾譯世界 Facebook 的最讚貼文
【愛的翻譯機:五種語言的媽媽我愛妳!】
身為會走路的翻譯機
其實我的媽媽
一直以來都有個小困擾⋯⋯
那就是大家以為
兒子英文專業,媽媽英文一定也很好吧!
我得說,媽媽的國學造詣極高
而英文的確不是強項
不過不影響我們的溝通
甚至我常常覺得成年後
中文講媽媽我愛你太肉麻的時候
講 Mom I love you 😘 更自在
我中學才開始認真學英文
到大學開始有機會幫媽媽翻譯
也有感到
愛媽媽不是掛在嘴上
也不是今天才慶祝
而是三不五時傳個貼圖
講講電話
吃個飯聊個天
送個小禮物
——
今天來翻譯「愛的五種語言」
源自作家 Gary Chapmen 的著作
“The Five Love Languages -
How to Express Heartfelt”
作者將愛分成五種語言
從話語、行動,到肢體接觸
每個人都有自己喜歡被愛的方式
讓我們來看看
你可以用哪5種方式和父母/另一半表達愛!
最大的重點是
要用對方喜歡被愛的方式愛他們
而不是自己認為他們喜歡的方式
—
1. Words of Affirmation (正向話語)
不論是Line還是面對面
今天一定要和母親說句:
「媽,今天妳怎麼那麼美?
跟平常一樣!☺️」
#浩爾小劇場開啟
2. Acts of Service(服務行動)
實際行動勝於一切
幫母親洗個碗、捶個背
主動的身體力行是大貼心代表
3. Receiving Gifts(接受禮物)
就算只是張小卡片
觀察母親的生活小細節
被放在心上的感覺也無可取代
4. Quality Time(珍貴時光)
再忙也要空出時間
和母親用電話聊個天、一起吃頓飯
在一起的每個時刻都很珍貴
5. Physical Touch(肢體接觸)
抱抱母親
一個擁抱的溫度
就足以讓人感到安定溫暖
各種抱媽媽的方法
>> https://www.instagram.com/p/B6akG_aFoft/?igshid=qxvhzee7vqi1
—
今年母親節
你用什麼方式和母親說我愛妳呢?
🔗 留言+1,就私訊你測驗連結!
記得拉著媽媽一起測
今天 #愛的翻譯機 就是你了!
用她喜歡的方式,好好愛她
#現在的仙女媽媽請見留言
#我媽寶我驕傲
#母親節快樂🎁
浩爾
words of affirmation中文 在 謙預 Qianyu.sg Facebook 的最讚貼文
(English writing below)
上星期天,我到一間小花圃做春節直播。
以我的慣例,我如果用到店家的地方,我都會買些東西,不佔他人做生意的便宜。
那天開直播前,本想通知店員一聲,但因為急著在一個時間點前結束,忘得一乾二淨,就有勞我師兄去物色購買適合的盆景。
當時有三位員工 - 兩位華族女子,一位異族外勞男子。
開播到一半時,男員工看到我先生的手機正播映著我的直播。
「哇!這是現場直播嗎?」他很興奮地問我先生,「在哪裡可以看?」
「你可以在臉書看。」
男員工二話不說,拿出手機,開啟臉書應用程序,請我先生為他找出我的臉書。先生輸入我的名字後,接下來就更好笑了。
我當時毫不知情,因為專注在直播。
結束後,我翻看按讚名單時,還想著怎麼會有異族朋友的名字。後來,先生才告訴我事情的來龍去脈。
昨天在剪輯直播,想這星期上傳到Youtube時,才發現那位男員工還向我鏡頭揮手,並展示播放著我直播的手機螢幕。😂
雖然我全程都說著華語,但想必他應該或多或少都聽得懂吧!
這畫面非常有趣,因為幾天前,一位女讀者來訊詢問我批八字的收費。(我服務的收費都列在:www.qianyu.sg/consultations 有中文網頁功能)
這女讀者說,我影片裡的資訊非常準確及珍貴。
我感謝她告訴我,因為我沒有印象在臉書互動裡看過她的名字。
她說她害羞。
這讓我想起另一位女客人,也曾說過類似的話。她說她一向很低調,所以雖然獲益匪淺,但從沒想過要按讚。
我問她:
萬一我寫了那麼多,卻得不到觀眾按讚的肯定,以致我放棄寫作與拍片呢?
她沒回答我。
我笑說,我雖不會因此而放棄,因為我曾經發過願,我也會用我的一生去履行我的發願。
但是,只拿不給,非君子所為,而是自私自利。 我也是人,自然也會需要認同感,尤其是寫的又是一些較另類的課題。
給予鼓勵是一種善行,也是一種感謝,無論是通過按讚、留言、分享,或告訴我。
直接與我貼文互動的好處是有時,可以利益其他比我們更需要這訊息的人。
打從我在去年六月底每星期更新Youtube影片後,我收到的詢問也多了。這些詢問當中,好一些是因為他們的臉書朋友分享了我的影片,而認識我。
他們的臉書朋友並不知道他們來找我服務。
畢竟,我們不會向全世界公佈我們的貼身問題。很多時候,向一個陌生人傾述你的問題,比向朋友訴苦還有用,因為那位陌生人有解決你問題的能力。
我在網路寫作已有三年半的時間,看過數百人。表面上看來是我在幫助人,但如大聖佛陀所言,眾生讓我們實踐自己的修行,幫助我們開悟成佛的人。
這是個互相利益的循環。
見的人越多,我越覺得娑婆世界如浮雲,終究沒有任何人事物是自己的。
寫作拍片越多,自己的思維與志向越明確。
我看到到因果的可怕,不想要我客人那般的命運,因此我更加謹言慎行。我親眼目睹貪、嗔、痴如何能毀掉一個人的人生,所以我打開自己的心房,學習把大愛放送出去,放下不利益他人的固執想法。
因此,感謝妳、你、您幫助我成為一個更好的人,幫我找到我的人生目標。這輩子,我從來沒有做一件事那麼開心過,我也想要一生就這樣做下去。
希望我也能幫助到你,盼你也能幫到別人。
___________________________
So last Sunday, I went to a plant stall to do a CNY Live.
As per my usual practice, I would always buy something from the shop if I use its premises. I don’t take advantage of other people’s businesses.
That day, I wanted to preempt the plant stall staff but in my haste to start my Live, I plain forgot about it. So the husband went about looking for a plant to buy on my behalf.
There were about three staff - two ladies and the gentleman standing behind me in this photo.
Halfway through my Live, the male staff saw the handphone screen of the Husband’s.
“Wah! It’s Live ah?” He excitedly asked the husband. “How to see?!”
“You can see on Facebook!”
The staff whipped out his mobile phone and opened the Facebook app. Then the husband typed in my profile name and what followed next was comical.
I wasn’t aware as I was very focused on presenting to my Live audience.
After the Live ended, I looked through the list of Likes to see who engaged with my video.
And I was wondering why there were some foreign names.
Then the husband told me what transpired.
Yesterday while editing the Live for my Youtube upload this week, I realised at one point in time, the staff also waved to my camera and flashed his handphone screen of my Live. 😂
I bet he somewhat understood what I said, despite it being in Mandarin.
It was an interesting moment because few days ago, a lady PM me to inquire about my Bazi consultation fee. (It’s all listed at www.qianyu.sg/consultations btw)
She told me the information in my videos were accurate and valuable.
I thanked her for telling me because I had never seen her name appeared in my engagement list.
She told me she was shy.
This reminded me of a Bazi client who told me the same thing. That client said she had always been low profile, so she did not think to Like my posts even though she benefitted from it.
I told the client:
But what if I stopped writing and filming because I received no or little affirmation from the audience?
She didn’t answered me.
I laughed and said I would not stop because I had made an aspiration in the past. I had made it my lifetime goal to keep my words.
But to be only taking and not giving is always selfish. I am human. And humans always need to feel belonged in one way or another. Even more so when I am writing about unorthodox topics.
Giving encouragement is a form of kindness and showing appreciation, be it through post engagements or telling me now.
The good thing about direct post engagement is that it benefits others, who may need the message more than us.
Since I started weekly uploads to YouTube in June, a lot more queries come in every month. A number of them know me, due to their FB friends sharing my videos on their timeline.
Thing is, their FB friend does not have a clue that they watched my video and came to seek my service.
We don’t go around telling the whole world our problems, you see.
Sometimes, it’s easier to tell a stranger who has the solutions, than a friend who can only tell you to think about happier things.
I have been posting online for 3.5 years and have met hundreds of people. Perhaps to you, it seems that I am helping people.
But like what Buddha says, the sentient beings are here to help us actualise our spiritual practice, to attain enlightenment and Buddhahood.
It is a reciprocal cycle. The more people I see, the more I realise how transient this Samsara world is. The more I write and film, the clearer I am in my thinking and aspirations.
I don't wish to have the kind of destinies I deal with, so I am more careful in my doings and thoughts. I see first-hand how greed, ignorance and anger can kill people, so I have opened up my heart to give out more love and let go of stubborn beliefs that benefit no one.
So thank you to you, you and you for helping me to be a better person and giving me a holy purpose in this life. I have never been happier in my entire lifetime and I want to do this for as long as I live.
I hope I can do the same for you, so that you will do the same for others too.